Description

Melanie Every tells us what to expect next, after the baby is born.

Transcript

Catrina Skepper: Unfortunately, a newborn baby doesn't come with an instruction manual. Most first time moms and dads will leave the hospital with a huge swath of questions and worries. All of a sudden, they have a tiny human being to look after and they are not sure what to do. Melanie Every is a midwife and she is here today to put some of those questions and anxieties debate. Melanie welcome to the program. Melanie Every: Hello! Catrina Skepper: Of course, once you've had the baby and all the family has been visiting around and the congratulations are over and you are in the safety perhaps of the hospital or even of your own home. Suddenly, that disappears, you're going home and you feel very alone. What do you say to first time moms? Melanie Every: I would say, enlist every bit of help you possibly can. Whether it's mothers, mothers-in-law, grandmothers, friends, neighbors, everybody you can possibly enlist to help you get them around. Now when I say that, I say get them to help you with the mundane chores of life. So that you can spend your time just with your baby. Get just getting to know each other, because that actually takes a little while. This is a new individual and you do have to get to know each other. Catrina Skepper: And is not just that, it's the practical thing. Perhaps you have never actually changed a nappy or bathe the baby, all these things that perhaps they don't have time necessarily to show you in the hospital therefore you just get on with it and it's simple to change the nappy but until you've done it, you might be afraid of hurting the baby and not doing it properly. Melanie Every: Well, I think one thing to remember is, babies are actually tougher, than most new moms think. We survived for million of years very well with no better abilities than we have now and in fact, we are perhaps more knowledgeable now than we've ever been. So don't worry too much. The baby will soon let you know if there is something wrong. You're much more likely to end up with a leaky nappy, if you don't get it quite right than harming the baby. Catrina Skepper: And also the screaming baby, I mean that's a natural thing, that mothers sometimes think that this is a sign of distress, but it's not necessarily so. Melanie Every: No, it's not. And what you need to remember is the crying is what babies do, that is how they communicate and in the early weeks, that's the only method of communication they have. So it doesn't necessarily mean that they're desperately distressed. And it doesn't do them any harm. I mean obviously if your baby's cry changes and you detect something different then you might need to be a bit more aware of it and perhaps have some questions. But sadly it's the parents that get exhausted by the baby's crying not the baby. Catrina Skepper: I think the first thing that also in hospital is that you try and think you've read all your manuals. You've told you got to establish a good feeding routine, are you going to breastfeed, are you going to bottle feed. I think that the routine that you have in hospital for the first 24 hours is probably rather you're lulled into full sense of security, because the baby sleeps a lot and you cuddle it and you get close to it. How strict are you in the information you give about feeding to new mothers? Melanie Every: I think it's like everything else in life. You need to be flexible. The first thing to remember is that the baby's don't read the books. And the baby will have his or her own routine. And particularly if you're breastfeeding, it's really not a good idea to try and get a baby into a very rigid routine in the very early weeks. The reason being that breastfeeding works very much on a supply and demand system. So if your baby feeds more frequently, it doesn't mean that you don't have enough milk. What it usually means is that your baby is having the growth spurt, and needs more milk. So that feeding more frequently, so that your body will make more milk, so that that will feed the growing baby. So women are often very, very disheartened when their baby feeds more frequently and think that they haven't got enough milk. That's not the case at all. Very rare. Catrina Skepper: But it's also quite distressing at first, because you are saying, a breastfeeding fine, you know the baby's born. If the baby latches on to the breast, that's one thing and you are off on your way, but quite often the milk doesn't come in for some days and mother is going to -- she start to worry that they're not feeding the child anything. Melanie Every: Well for the first few days, the baby will get colostrum which is the substance that's in the breast right from beginning. Catrina Skepper: Which by the way does not look like milk. Melanie Every: No, it doesn't. No, it's got a kind of funny almost like a grayish-bluey color. It's quite funny looking. Only a little of it. But it's highly concentrated and very nutritious. So it is ideal for the baby. It's also full of human antibodies as well, so it's helping to give the baby protection against disease. So it is a very, very valuable liquid. And then nature being, what it is, it usually goes completely over the top. And some way around about day three or four you'll certainly have a huge surge of milk and you'll have more than and you don't know what to do it or in fact to pull baby actually. Catrina Skepper: And also some pain associated with it? Melanie Every: It can be, yes. It can get quite uncomfortable. Catrina Skepper: What about the initial stages of breastfeeding, and obviously it's what? You know it's advised to young moms, but not everyone can breastfeed. It can be very much that problem with the baby, even latching on in a first place. How do you deal with that and what advice do you give to them? Melanie Every: Well, I think there is two things to say. I think don't give up too soon, because breastfeeding can take four to six weeks to really get itself established. So don't think that because it hasn't worked within the first few days that it isn't going to. Because quite often it does, but you can take a bit of perseverance. Catrina Skepper: But as long as the baby is actually able to latch on, then your milk supply will continue presumably? Melanie Every: Yes, it will continue, yes. As long as the baby is taking milk that will encourage your body to continue to make more milk, so the system will continue to function. Catrina Skepper: The perseverance. Melanie Every: Perseverance again, relax and concentrate on just you and the baby and forget -- get the help us to do all the other things. Just spend time with you and the baby and enjoy it. Try and just sit back and enjoy it. I know it doesn't feel enjoyable in those very early weeks. But actually it does pay dividends, once you get to about four weeks. It all starts to fit into place so much better and you'll have a much more contented baby from then onwards. Catrina Skepper: Now that I can watch for that special -- they love it. It's just -- mothers you have sometimes a harder time. Now for a women who actually elects not to breastfeed for whatever reason or maybe after some traumatic surgery or cesarean birth and what help that they need because it can be quite difficult also physiologically, if you want to breastfeed and you then find you can't. Melanie Every: If you can't. I think you have to come to terms with the fact that you can't and that you'll still be able to do the best feel baby by giving the baby, bottle milk. What is important is that you continue to give the baby the same kind of closeness and cuddling, that the baby would have had if you've been breastfeeding. Catrina Skepper: So it's actually important to hold your baby even if you're not breastfeeding, bottle feeding? Melanie Every: It is, it is, yes, because nature is actually very clever. Babies can see from birth about the distance from your breast to your face, so if you hold the baby in the same position that recognition will develop and the baby will learn that you are his or her mother. Catrina Skepper: What about nutritional phase? I mean people are so much in favor of breastfeeding, but you know all your doing your baby into service, lot of mothers who aren't breastfeeding would be worried that maybe for the future they might be affecting their baby's health. Melanie Every: Modern day formula milks are very, very close to breast milk. So if you can't breastfeed, the best thing for you to do is to be relaxed about it and still have the same closeness and feel fairly confident that your baby is still getting adequate nutrition. Catrina Skepper: What about the complications that can come once you go home with breastfeeding particularly, something that I've experienced, so mastitis is that something that you read about in books and you just hope it's not going to happen to you. But it is very frequent, what are the early signs of mastitis, what is it first off? Melanie Every: Well, it depends whether you are talking about some early inflammation that is related to the milk coming in and the big increase in blood supply, which is not necessarily anything harmful, but it can be very, very uncomfortable. And it can occasionally even cause a slight rise in temperature, very slight. That can make you feel a bit woozy, third day to fifth day after the baby is born, which usually coincides with the baby blues. So you can be feeling a bit wretched at that time. So it's important to let the baby feed frequently, because that helps take the milk supply. That's one of the most important things that you can do and to wear a really good comfortable bra so that you're getting the right support, no underwires, plenty of support. And sometimes taking frequent showers can help it, just relieves that a little bit of discomfort. Catrina Skepper: Should use, I heard cold compresses or hot compresses, which is? Melanie Every: Well, what hot and cold compresses do is they stimulate the blood supply, which may make the things feel more comfortable. Whether it actually makes any long term difference into how long you have that discomfort, we don't really know. There is no clear evidence. But if it makes you feel more comfortable, it's certainly not going to do you any harm. Catrina Skepper: And obviously the first sign of the temperature you would call your doctor? Melanie Every: Yes, you would talk to him -- even you will call your midwife. Catrina Skepper: Your midwife? Melanie Every: Yes, yes. Catrina Skepper: What about the baby blues, you just touched on it then, I mean it's something that we've all heard about, but what actually is it and why does it occur? Melanie Every: It mainly occurs because of the huge hormonal changes, causing a great deal of disruption and obviously with a new baby tightness is a factor as well, plus this massive life change. You know this is something that's going to change your life forever and not just you may love your baby, sometimes that can be a little bit difficult to come to terms with. You certainly feel that you're not going to go anywhere without taking this little person with you, which can take some adaptation. So what's important is to talk about it. If you're feeling -- Catrina Skepper: And be honest about it and obviously trying to appeal to, to somebody close to you for help, if that's a case. Is it something which actually can be treated medically or is it something you just have to work through physically? Melanie Every: Well, if we are talking about what you might called simple baby blues, so that doesn't feel simple at the time. It usually passes with time and as long as you get adequate rest and you're eating well, it will pass. If it's something more serious that looks as though it's heading towards postnatal depression, then it is important that you seek help as soon as possible. And it's wise for relatives to be aware of that because sometimes the mother herself doesn't recognize it and it will be other family members who recognize that something isn't quite right. And it's usually things like not sleeping well, particularly waking early in the morning, not eating well. Sometimes becoming a little bit obsessive and worrying about minor things even more the new moms do normally. And it's wise to seek advice if you find that's happening to somebody. Catrina Skepper: Going on a little bit in time and contact with midwife which you feel very vulnerable without when you leave the hospital. How soon will the midwife come and see you after a baby is born. Melanie Every: It shall usually come in following day and then by agreement with you depending on what she feels you need and what you feel you need. But she will always leave you a telephone number where you can speak to a midwife, if you've got any questions. And I think the most important thing to say to any new mom is don't think your question is silly. If you're worried, pick up the phone and ring. Catrina Skepper: And what about the medical care after birth as well because you probably need, mother needs checkup so as the baby, what are those immediate? Melanie Every: Well, if the baby is born in hospital, probably be checked over before and leave hospital or somethings that you people come on check the baby over at home. Obviously the midwife will do routine checks on both you and the baby, and then some weeks later, usually around about six weeks, you'll probably pop-up to your GP for a postnatal check. Catrina Skepper: And would it be the same midwife that you'd side or would it be somebody else in the community? Melanie Every: You may not see the same midwife everyday and it may obviously not be the same midwife who was there at the birth. But it's quite likely to be the same midwife that you saw during pregnancy. Catrina Skepper: And they take notes and obviously passing on case notes to each other, so it's not as you have to give the whole history of your pregnancy and your time in hospital again. Melanie Every: No, that's right and in fact the notes are usually with you. They are usually left with you. Catrina Skepper: What about the food during breastfeeding that's something that I am sure you're asked often, what should you avoid and what should you encourage? Melanie Every: Again, good healthy diet. Lots of women find they're actually remarkably hungry when they're breastfeeding. You used up a lot of calories breastfeeding and still lose that pregnancy weight. So definitely don't think about dieting when you are breastfeeding. You need those calories. And obviously things like alcohol is not a good idea. Catrina Skepper: Because everything gets passed through the breast milk. Melanie Every: Yes. It does. But it doesn't actually change the consistency of the breast milk in the way that a lot of people think. So if you want to eat a curry then eat it. Lots of cultures do as part of their normal diet. It doesn't stop them breastfeeding and it doesn't stop the baby breastfeeding. So don't restrict your diet, because of old wives have tells about not being able to eat grapes or spicy food or anything like that. Catrina Skepper: Cabbage. Melanie Every: Or Cabbage, yes. People will tell you all sorts of tales, and actually that kind of put some woman off breastfeeding, so eat your normal diet. But alcohol is not too good in idea because it does go through and can make the baby very sleepy. And indeed a lot of strong coffee may affect baby, because caffeine goes through and if you've got a very weight full baby, think about are you drinking a lot of strong coffee. Catrina Skepper: And tea for that matter, because obviously people forget that a nice cup of tea contain a little bit of caffeine as well. And what about vitamin supplements? Should you take them while you're breastfeeding? Melanie Every: If you've got a really good diet, then you shouldn't need them. And obviously if you're too worried about whether your diet is good enough for whatever reason then talk to your midwife and seek her advice. Catrina Skepper: If there was a myth that you would like to explode on having babies, what would that be? I mean in order for mothers to be feeling confident but at the same time not to be thinking this is just are going to be a wonderful dream? Melanie Every: Babies are human beings and old human beings have their faults, so life with a new baby is never going to be perfect. Sometimes it can be quite trying and very tiring, but when you get that first smile and their little face lights up, it's all worth it. Catrina Skepper: Definitely. Thank you so much very, very much for coming and talk to us. We were forward to see you. Melanie Every: Okay bye.