Sue explains why it is important for women to share and connect with friends and how did you meet women who share similar interests.
Menopause and Connecting with Friends - Sue's Story Why Is Sharing And Connecting With Friends Important For Women? Sue: It is so critical for women to share what they are going through with their girlfriends. Women have this need where we need to talk about what is happening. I think with me and with hundreds of women that I’ve talked with, we think we are the only one that is going through some thing. Even though it could be menopause or it could be something that almost every woman would go through, we think we are the only one that is suffering the way that we are suffering. We do not think of talking to anybody else about it. We have spent so much of our time as we’ve grown up. We have been conditioned to be the caretaker. So, we are getting married. We are taking care of our husbands. We are having children. We are taking of the children. We are taking care of the families. We are taking care of everything, putting everybody before ourselves and we are exhausted. Once you get to the point in life that I am at where I am 54 years old, even late 40s, early 50s, when you realize that the kids are grown, they’re living the nest; maybe it is time for the husband to leave or maybe he has already left, it does not have to be that. It could be that you’ve moved to Arizona. You are retiring. There are so many different things that are going on in our lives right now. It is a constant state of change whether it is our health or whatever. If we do not have anybody to lean on, our girlfriends to lean on then we’re in it alone, we are upset, depressed and we feel like we have no place to go. I realized this after I have gotten divorced. I had some girlfriends from my marriage but it was totally different and I needed girlfriends that I could go out and have fun with and confide in with. And so, I started this group called Wild Boomer Women because I have been a wild child at the 70’s and I thought that sound it like fun. And so, I started this group to see -- I wonder if there are other women out here like me that are just looking for fun. I put it out on the Meetup site, Meetup.com where you just can have a group and people can find women that want to have fun together and your group will come up. I put it out on Monday and by Friday; I had hundred people sign up. This was just in Phoenix and I thought, “Okay, I am really on to something.” We had our first gathering and it was 25 women that none of us knew each other. We got together for a place to have dinner. We just sat and talked. I had a structured thing because I had been a corporate trainer before, so I knew how to engage people and get people talking. Before you knew it, we were laughing hysterically, we were telling stories, we were relating on so many levels that within two and a half hours, we were friends. It has been two years since I started the group in Phoenix almost to the day. These are some of my best and closest friends in the world that it feels like I have known them my whole life. I have this group of women that I can call and I can talk to. They are there for me and I am there for them, especially when we get to this point in life, there is none of the bickering, there is none of the competition, it is just women that want to have fun while enjoying life the second half of life. It is so critical that we have the ability to do this. I am seeing women that are still changing their desk. They are still workaholics, whether they have got the kids at home or not, whether they got the husband at home or not. Whatever their situation is, they are not allowing themselves to go out and have fun. What we do at Wild Boomer Women is we help to teach them how to put themselves first because one of the things is that if you do not take time for yourself and if you do not reach your batteries, you are not going to be any good for anybody else. Just by having fun and just by sharing support, that’s been a Godsend for so many women. I get these amazing comments for women, “Thank you for doing this and thank you for organizing this” and to me it is fun. I am glad to do it because it helps me. I think it helps me more than it helps them but sometimes they want to argue and say “You do it all” but that’s what I enjoy doing.