DadLabs Ep. 285 The Lab - Dirty diapers are so over-hyped. The Big Poopy gets all the media attention, but DadLabs is willing to speak the truth about true parenting grossness. Feeding can take on any other baby bodily function for pure disgusting-ness. The DadLabs dads give you a guided tour of the first year of feeding your child. Distributed by Tubemogul.
Daddy Clay: Welcome back to The Lab, this week on Dadlabs is brought to you entirely by Boon, innovations for modern parents. Daddy Brad: You know daddy Clay, when it comes to the disgusting side of parenting, poopy diapers get all the ink. Daddy Clay: That is true, dirty diapers, vomits, these are all disgusting but nobody out there in the parenting space is bold enough to talk about-- Daddy Brad: Just for Dadlabs. Daddy Clay: Except for Dadlabs, no one is willing to talk about just how disgusting it is to give your small child food. Daddy Brad: Yuck! See they fool you at first about the food thing because of breast-feeding, it is so beautiful and natural and really healthy for the baby. Very few spills and dad can’t do it, perfect. Daddy Clay: Even in about four months when you start to give the baby a little bit of this rice cereal, it is still a very sweet operation, relatively neat, even at six months, you are adding a little bit of fruit puree, still very nice. Baby is neat, everything is cool, then a change happens at about seven months. Because about that time, they grow a pair of these, claws, pinchers if you will. And this pincher and everything changes. Sure they can feed themselves those cute little rice pops, but also carpet fuzz, snails, loose change and bottle caps, that will hatch, then you start busting open a pureed vegetable, and then the meat. And everything starts to smell just a little bit like dog vomit. Daddy Brad: Then there is the phase when they want to start wrestling the spoon, they see this big thing coming at them with a bunch of food on it so they grab it, then the food is not on it anymore so they get pissed off and when you take it back they get doubly pissed off, oh man. My strategy was just keep shoveling in, keep moving fast, never slow down. Now they did not quite get it in the mouth, it doesn’t matter, just kind of around the mouth is okay. But then, stuff would drop on the tray, that is when it gets really sloppy, they start finger painting, this stuff is getting all over the place and they just get really messy. Daddy Clay: By that 16 months, your guy is going to be feeding himself big boy food in the high chair which is a really exciting moment, although, they may have picked up some bad habits along the way. If your child is a messy eater and is sometimes dropping food on the floor or other places, you may want to spread a shower curtain down, underneath the high chair that will protect against spills. If this bad behavior continues, it is very important that you will not react to the child. They are trying to get a reaction from you with this bad behavior and if you react too strongly, you could end up encouraging the child instead of discouraging the child, so it is very important, just be patient, do not react. You’re so cute, it is just part of growing up. So, if a bad behavior does continue, it is important to remember, patience is a key. I love you. Daddy Brad: Then there is the question of when you move the kid from the high chair to the family table, and the answer is, when do you want to replace the rag? We try to keep them in the high chair as long as possible, three to three and a half years and we have all the negotiating power here because we have the food. When it is finally time to move them from the high chair to the table, we like to make a big deal out of it, when they get most of the stuff in their mouth and the plate and it is not all on the floor, what do you have there? Then it is time to move him on—do you eat with that? Let’s eat. Daddy Clay: So, feeding may be gross but like a lot of other gross things and parenting, if you missed even a minute of it you got to be sorry so even though feeding is disgusting, you need to remember, it is also hilarious and sometimes amazing. Daddy Brad: So get in there and do your half after breastfeeding anyway. You will never regret any time that you spend feeding your children, no matter the splatter. Daddy Clay: If you got a particularly horrendous feeding story or a tip or hint, please drop us a comment, le